Perfect Chaos

Friends, please forgive me for writing another personal post today. I really need to express the thoughts and feelings I’m presently experiencing.

I feel so stuck – trapped on this ward. After 10 weeks here things seem to be getting harder rather than better. There is spiritual darkness on the ward, and despite my best efforts to pray through it, that oppressive energy remains.

I haven’t eaten properly for a couple of days. I chipped a tooth while eating and it’s left a sharp edge which is digging into my tongue, making it swell. It’s painful to swallow.

I asked to see the consultant to discuss numerous things earlier in the week but she is seemingly ignoring me. I have never experienced a doctor like this one.

I feel very angry and frustrated about being kept here against my will. My only hope of being discharged is that God will have mercy on me and create a way out. If you’re willing to pray for me to be discharged, I’d be most grateful.

Thank you for reading, and thanks be to God.